retrospectral
by Constance Greene
Summary: It all started with a simple question — “D’you remember when we were kids?” — and then the ghosts came out. — SoraRikuKairi


• retrospectral •

The title – I know it isn't a word. It's 'retrospect' and 'spectral' combined: retro-spectral. Such as with recalling events and ghosts of the past.

SoraRikuKairi friendshiplove. Just talking.

**Disclaimer**; Not mine.

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"D'you remember when we were kids?"

Riku started them off. He poked and prodded the sand with a stick that had washed up on shore; it was stripped bare as a jagged white icicle.

They knew he didn't necessarily mean kid-kids: starting at six and up. He meant when they were kids-but-not-kids. Kids who travelled to other worlds like it was an everyday thing.

Kairi reclined back and smiled lightly, a nostalgic far-off look in her violet eyes. "Seems like so long ago."

"It was only, say, five years."

"I was being reminiscent."

"Oh."

"As in, acting old."

Sora leaned over and put a concerned hand on her shoulder. "Do your bones hurt, Kairi?"

They broke up into careless laughter. Somewhere deep within it, the ghosts of their youth danced.

"You know, we still act like kids sometimes."

"'Specially Sora." Riku punched said boy/man affectionately on the arm.

He grinned a close-lipped smile. "Don't hate."

"We used to say that a lot," Riku mused.

"Yeah, amongst other things."

"D'you know why we're still together?"

"The paopu fruit, right?" Kairi asked.

"Right. The paopu fruit."

". . ."

All three were silent for a few moments and contemplated the yellow star-shaped fruit; they were remembering.

"I always thought Riku would be the first one to suggest it," The crimson-haired girl put in.

"Yeah, he was always going on about them. Scared me once."

"I scared you, Sora?" The young man with silver hair said sarcastically, rolling his icy blue eyes. They flashed with the flame of the firelight.

"You sure scared me when you said there was a clown hiding beneath my bed. I had nightmares for _years_. Still do."

"Maybe you should get over that somehow." The eldest draped an arm across Kairi's narrow shoulders, drawing her close. "Here, our friend here is a psychologist. Tell Dr. Kairi all your troubles."

"Not Doctor _yet_."

Sora scrunched up his face delicately. "You know I _hated_ clowns."

Riku paused a moment to consider. "Me too."

Silence once more. It wasn't exactly awkward dry space; it was just the Memory Ghoul sweeping over their relaxing, sitting bodies and paying their minds a visit.

"Sora was the one who told us to eat it, wasn't he?"

"More like forced." Riku snorted.

"We split it into three's and I gave you both a piece. I was afraid about losing you guys."

"Old friendships fall apart; paopu ties never die." Came the wisecrack, issuing from Riku's skeptical mouth. But it was true. All of it.

Kairi raised her hand half-way, almost guiltily. "I actually was planning on doing the same thing if you hadn't, Sora, when we got back home."

They both looked at Riku.

"It was in my mind since the start. Since . . . after I turned into Ansem's form." He winced slightly at the memories. Some were sweet and warming; others were more bitter. "First I just wanted to share it with Kairi."

"I think you just secretly wanted to share it with Sora, but you were too embarrassed to say it." Kairi teased.

The aquamarine-eyed male let out a short bark of laughter. "Maybe you're right."

"Aww, Riku loves me," Sora said, taunting. "Admit it."

Riku struggled away as the boy leaned towards him, hands and knees on the ground.

"You cared," Kairi persisted warmly.

"C'mon, Riku. Give in . . . is it really so hard to say, now?"

Kairi folded her arms upon her upraised knees. "I know _I _love you guys."

"I love you too, Kairi." His eyes shifted to Riku.

"I love you, Riku!"

"All right, Sora; I love you too."

They all embraced and nearly collapsed, laughing softly. Their laughter drifted off into the night.

"Aren't we all a bunch of saps," Said Riku. "We should go off and have a threesome, eh?"

"Sounds positively bouncy to me," Sora proclaimed in a dramatic accent; perhaps Australian.

Pause.

"I think Riku's the most grown-up here," Kairi noted.

"Not fair; he has a year's advantage," Sora pouted.

"No . . . not me," He sighed. "I'm still fighting with the old me. The kid me."

"Still?"

"Still."

Kairi rubbed his back helpfully. He let a soft groan slip his lips, feeling the bunched muscles between his shoulders gradually beginning to loosen. "We're always here for you, Riku."

"Yeah. I know that."

"He angsts," Sora piped up.

"Angsts?" The taller male quirked a brow.

"You do it a lot."

"I do not."

"You deny things a lot, too."

"Goodness, Riku, I thought you were much wiser," Kairi said slyly, lifting her eyes up to the charcoal-blanketed sky.

"_You _angst too, you know, Sora."

"Oh, yeah? When?"

"You told us," Kairi interjected. She glanced at Riku hesitantly. "At least, I think that's what Riku's talking about. Once. About the Heartless. And the Organization."

Sora's lips tightened.

"When Sexas . . ."

"Saïx," The brunette corrected in a clipped tone.

"Right. They all sound the same."

"Is Naminé fading?" Sora joked.

Kairi's hand fluttered over her heart. "No, she's still here. She just wants to . . . forget."

Sora dipped his head in understanding.

"When Saïx told you. That you were just helping them, giving them more hearts for their master plan . . . you nearly broke down."

"It was so stressful." Sora rubbed the side of his head, flipping his spikes. "I felt that I couldn't do a thing right. I was _supposed_ to get rid of those Heartless – but I was supposed to eliminate the Organization, too."

"The clowns beneath your bed . . . what are they now, Sora?" Riku asked quietly.

"The Organization," He whispered, eyes lowered. "I can't get over them. I just . . . can't. It's like they're haunting me." He paused. "And I don't understand! I didn't care about . . . destroying them . . . until _after_." His lips tugged into a frown. "I thought I was doing the right thing."

"You were, in the end," Kairi offered encouragingly. "You just bounced right back like you always do. No problem."

"A great rebounder," Riku said.

"I just can't get over those eyes . . ."

Riku and Kairi exchanged unsteady looks again. Sora's gaze was focused on the ground momentarily, so he didn't notice. But then he looked up, eyes fixed directly at Riku.

"You remind me of him."

"For the last time, my eyes aren't green."

The young woman poked his cheek near his eye. "Hum, more like blue-green, really."

But Riku was still not going to let the topic go. "That kook?" He started again, lifting his eyes up to heaven doubtfully. "He _does_ look like a clown."

He shrugged a shoulder, smiling slightly to himself. "I dunno. I guess it's 'cause you're my best friend, just like he was Roxas's."

Riku only grumbled. "I've been possessed enough, thanks." Kairi erupted into cheerful laughter, until a quick looked silenced her.

"Riku was always secretly sensitive," She said.

"Since when?"

"With your muffins."

"Oh God, the muffins." Sora chuckled.

"I'm just very protective over my muffins, that's all," Riku claimed defensively.

"That one time when I was about to walk into the kitchen. I stood in the doorway when I heard you go, 'Who touched my muffin?'" She mimicked his grumpy voice, much more monotonous than hers right now. Then she burst into a series of childlike giggles, reminding them all of how she used to giggle when she was younger.

"I don't like people eating my food."

"I thought it was some kind of sexual innuendo. I thought . . . I thought Sora was in there with you – I just couldn't see him." She cupped a hand over her mouth to smother the giggles.

"Would you like to butter my muffin?" Sora classically asked, and then began to join in with the fragmented laughter.

"Kairi . . . you . . ." But he was at loss of words. Riku put a hand over his forehead, cracking up himself in disbelief.

"I'm _sorry_. I was sixteen."

"No excuse, miss." And he reached for her again and ruffled her hair, which she had grown out slightly. It cascaded down her back, a glimmering pool of liquid copper and cherry.

"I think we remember," Sora said.

"Remember what?" Riku had forgotten his first question.

"What it was like when we were kids."

They drew in for the night, residing to the higher part of the beach to sleep side-by-side, Riku-Kairi-Sora, just like when they were kids. Just as it should be.

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Inspired by _It_ and various fanfics. I think SoraRikuKairi needs more simple love and attention.


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